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The Question

My tribe pays a fat monthly per cap. The checks have really gone up in the past few years and while it’s awesome to have so much money, there are problems too, such as freeloaders looking to marry tribal members so they can live off our per caps. My brother has fallen for one of these gold diggers. It’s so obvious to the family that she is only using him for money but he just can’t see it. Once they started dating she quit her job, and he has bought her 2 cars, a diamond necklace and more clothes than she can fit in her closet over the last 6 months. The wedding is right around the corner. How can I make him understand that money can’t buy love?

Our Answer

I still wonder if the Beatles were right when they said “Money can’t buy me love.” This is a tough situation to be in. You’re not the first person to express this concern. The sad reality is that money can bring out the vulture in people. The saying “mo’ money mo’ problems” (we won’t forget you Biggie!) definitely rings true on this one. The best advice that I can offer your brother is a legal document called a prenuptial agreement. A prenup is a binding agreement between two future spouses that states exactly how the couple’s assets such as a home, cars, cash, and other items will be divided in the event things don’t work out. The divorce rate in the United States is just over 50% so a prenup is definitely something to consider. The prenup protects the interests of both parties (which is something your brother might want to tell his fiancée if she objects). Sit down with your brother and take a laid-back approach. You probably want to avoid telling him his fiancée is a gold digger because he won’t want to hear it. But you can make sure he understands the financial risks he faces if the marriage doesn’t work out. And even though a prenup is no guarantee that he won’t lose any money in a divorce, it’s a lot better than nothing. An attorney can draft up a basic prenuptial agreement for around $1,000, which is a small price to pay in the event the marriage doesn’t work out.

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